How the hours passed…

I remember my first day at nursery.  Mama was pushing me in my pram along one of  our quieter village streets.  It was a bright sunny day, a little chilly but bright nonetheless.  I wasn’t sure what time of year it was, I just remember mama had wrapped me up warm and I was very cosy. Mama used to love lecturing me on topics that I had no idea about.  Time was the topic of today’s lecture, the concept of time.  Slowly I became aware of time as my memory of Christina started to fade.  After the Opera show and the performance I made, Christina did all she could to limit my public appearances.  In fact, I no longer took part in television debates and the only coverage I received was in medical journals such as The Lancet and on rare occasions I would have my photograph appear in the press, usually when I was with mama and papa playing in the park and a stray paparazzi had been present.

Mama and papa only wanted the best nursery for me. After over a year of research and visiting several nurseries, mama and papa decided on the one near the local clock tower.  I always smiled when I saw the clock tower because it was brightly coloured and made a very nice musical sound every once in a while.  Mama continued to explain the concept of time to me and I found it quite boring.  Did I really need to know about time?  How was time going to benefit me?  The only time I cared about were the times I had seen Christina and now I could barely remember her, the sound of her voice, what she looked like or even what it felt like to be held by her.

I kept thinking about Christina and what little I could remember. In the  background I could hear mama drone on about time and how much time it would take to arrive at the nursery.  I had no idea what a nursery was since mama had not thought to explain that concept to me.  She did mention though that nursery would “go by in no time” and as she rambled on I started to grow sleepy and must have dozed off because the next thing I remember was waking up startled,  inside a big building which smelt a bit of sweaty shoes.  I could hear some loud voices. “At last we meet, Mrs Marvel,” said a tall, gaunt, middle aged woman.  I couldn’t take my eyes off her and I could hear her talking to mama, explaining, “Mrs Marvel, soon the press will be here, and as promised we are only allowing one camera crew in, and we have asked them to use natural lighting, so may I suggest we get you both ready and have you sit close to the window?”  Mama nodded as the tall lady led us towards a changing room at the far end of  the room to the right of a stage.

Mama closed the door and took me out of my pram.  She gave me a big hug, ran her fingers through my hair and then looked at me “Marie, I have a wonderful surprise for you my darling, we just have to get ready now, I want you looking your best”.  I started to vibrate and I was feeling a little nervous.  Mama didn’t have a stethoscope because she was advised that I should be allowed to develop as a normal child and that medics should only use one whilst examining me.  As a result mama did not hear my inner voice but instead she heard me ask “what mama?”  Mama started dressing me.  I used to love wearing jeans, t-shirts and sports shoes but mama and papa used to love seeing me in dresses especially during special occasions. I knew today was going to be special because mama pulled out a new dress from my changing bag.  It was red and white with stripes and dots.  I had red shoes to match, white tights and a red and white hat which looked a little bit like a strawberry.  Mama had a changing bag for herself and she also had a red and white dress which didn’t look half as ridiculous as mine.  Mama had tights that were the colour of her skin and I thought this was funny so I started giggling at her as she put them on.  She put on some shoes which looked like they were held up with sticks and when mama walked I thought to myself, how on earth can you balance on those.  It was many years later that I learned they were called stilettos.

Mama sprayed some perfume on herself, unlocked the door, and jumped. “Mrs Evans! I didn’t expect to see you here!” I looked up and saw the tall, gaunt woman and now I knew her name.  She leaned over me and pinched my cheek. I winced with pain and wondered, “Why do people do that?” Mama picked me up as Mrs Evans rushed us back out towards the room we had entered earlier on.  I looked around and there were at least a hundred people there.  I placed my head between mamas breasts and closed my eyes. A few seconds later I heard a soft voice say, “My darling, it’s been so long,” and I felt two hands on my sides and someone pulling me towards them as mama released me.  I knew that voice, it was so familiar to me, I didn’t want to open my eyes so I curled myself into a ball as the lady turned  me towards her and I buried my head into her neck.  The smell of freshly cut flowers and the softness of her neck, her hair covered my head,  I could hear her giggle and I was too shy to speak, instead I started to vibrate as I opened my eyes, it was Christina.  No sooner had I started to vibrate she placed a stethoscope on my belly and heard me singing “Mamma mia, here I go again, my my, how can I resist you?” Abba’s number one hit of 1976.

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Marisa Scary.

The present day… 5.10am.

Above the ocean and hurtling towards Queerdom’s borders Marisa Scary approached with a tornado-like force.  Beneath her the sea was growing fierce, the waves were rising as Marisa blew out a deep breath followed by an ear piercing screech, thus creating a series of waves directed at The United Queerdom. Mademoiselle Lesbiana,  looked down at the ocean and noticed that something strange was beginning to happen – a tidal wave was forming and quickly making its way to the shores of the United Queerdom.  Without a moment’s hesitation she flew with supersonic speed towards the mass of water while releasing a force of wind which broke through the wave, returning calmness and serenity to the ocean. Marisa Scary, angered by this interruption, continued to blow and screech with all her might as she flew closer towards the border.  Mademoiselle Lesbiana gained pace and with a turbo boost launched herself towards Marisa Scary.  Cutting through the dawn skies at the speed of sound the clouds parted leaving behind her a white trail. Finally face to face with Marisa Scary, the clouds re-grouped and the letters ML appeared in the sky above.

Marisa Scary had a petite figure with long blonde hair and honey brown eyes. She wore a pink and white fitted leather onesie, behind which draped a white cape with her initials centred in pink diamantes.   She wore thigh length white leather boots with six inch heels, a ridiculous feature of her so-called superhero outfit which she relished as her secret weapon.  She would attack her victims by launching herself towards them and at the last minute performing a round kick, impaling her enemies’ vital organs on her heels.  Then she would send shock waves through her victim’s body as she swung them around and kicked them off, sending them to their fateful destiny.  Madmemoiselle Lesbiana found this technique rather silly and not well thought through.  It was quite an easy attack to defend but Marisa Scary was one of those “I-know-it-all” types.  Besides, Mademoiselle Lesbiana did not want to bring to her attention the major weakness in her striking tactic. Face-to- face, Mademoiselle Lesbiana looked at Marisa Scary and said sternly, “Do yourself a favor honey and leave now.  You have no business here,” gesturing dismissively with her hand for Marisa to leave. Ignoring her enemy, Marisa made a sudden dive towards Mademoiselle Lesbiana and swung her body around and launched her legs towards her.  In a flash Mademoiselle Lesbiana had shot herself round and once again was facing Marisa Scary. “You are better off going back home before this gets ugly!”.   Marisa Scary replied,”Ugly! I’ll show you ugly, bitch!” and then let out the most hideous screech!  Covering her ears and flying away from Marisa, Mademoiselle turned around and shouted, “Bring it on” and with that she flew towards Marisa with her fists held out before her.  Marisa prepared herself to turn and attempt to impale her heels into her enemies lungs but Mademoiselle was prepared for this ridiculous tactic and at the last minute swerved and grabbed Marisa by the hair. She swung Marisa like a cat by its tail* and threw her towards the horizon.  She then flew towards Marisa and let out a deep breath that was so cold it encased Marisa in ice as she continued to hurtle towards the horizon.  Watching the ice maiden as she grew smaller in the distance Mademoiselle yelled, “now get the heck out of here and don’t you dare show your face again”.  Mademoiselle Lesbiana watched until the ice-encased Marisa was out of sight and beyond the horizon.  She looked down at the sea beneath her and enjoyed the view.  The sun had now risen and the blue sky reflected off the ocean making it look tranquil and calm.  Convinced that Marisa Scary would not return, Mademoiselle flew down to skim the ocean, and cruised gently back to the island.

As the inhabitants of the United Queerdom were waking up, Mademoiselle was almost home.  On her way, she spotted Auntie, the island’s matriarch sat in her garden sipping on her morning tea.  Mademoiselle smiled down and shot off as fast as possible before Auntie noticed her.  Auntie was known for being a gossip and Mademoiselle wanted to avoid her attention.

*No cats were harmed whilst writing this post.

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Mayday! Mayday!

The present day…

5:05am.

A Mayday alarm continued in Mademoiselle Lesbianas head as she flew across the  Island dawn sky to face Queerdom’s Enemy Number One, Marisa Scary. Halfway across the island and still incredibly sleepy she spotted the islands coffee franchise slightly ahead of her on the ground below, Galaxy Coffee Inc.  Galaxy Coffee Inc, had a recognisable golden dome which incidentally was the company logo.   Looking at her wrist watch she suddenly made a nose dive aware that she could spare a couple of minutes for a much needed caffeine fix.

Inside Galaxy Coffee, Mademoiselle Lesbiana  made her way to the counter while she gently rubbed her eyes, stretched out her arms and yawned.  Ahead of her she saw a beautiful barista who stuttered in disbelief “G-g-g-good morning.  H-h-h-how can I…I…I help you?” whilst she gawped at her first customer of the day.  Mademoiselle Lesbiana looked at the barista gave her a big smile.  “At least I have something to be happy about this morning” she casually thought to herself as a smile appeared on her face.  She locked eyes with the beautiful short haired, voluptuous brunette who started blushing.   She walked towards her quickly glanced at her chest in order to read her name badge “Good morning, Lisa” she replied and paused while leaning across the counter.  Lisa was amazed to see Mademoiselle Lesbiana. “I would love a double shot black americano with a couple of ice cubes.  Please be quick I’m on duty.” she continued.   Lisa blushed and tripped managing to catch her own fall  as she awkwardly walked towards the coffee machine.   Madoiselle Lesbiana couldn’t help but notice Lisa’s curved but defined physique. Aware the her customer was making eyes at her Lisa blushed as she overfilled the paper cup.  A little flustered she unbuttoned her crimson red shirt loosened it slightly then took a deep breath.  She turned and walked towards the counter and handed Mademoiselle Lesbiana the coffee.  She mumbled, “T-t-this is on t-t-the house”.  Mademoiselle Lesbiana smiled at Lisa while she carefully took the coffee out of her hands and replied, “Thank you.  I will make it up to you someday soon.  In the meantime, have a superhero heck of a day” with a quick wink she turned her back to the counter rushed out and was up in the sky.

She sipped her coffee then looked casually at her watch.  With very little time to make it across the island and towards Marisa Scarey who was about to breach The United Queerdoms borders she spotted a trash can ahead of her.  She took one final gulp of coffee then dropped it into the trash can below. Punching into the air, pleased with the disposal of her coffee cup she yelled “result”.  With no time to hesitate she pressed the switch on her leather armband which boosted her out to sea towards the parameters of international waters.  As she got closer to her enemy the high pitched alarm was almost deafening.  It indicated that Marisa Scarey was close by and about to breach the Islands border.    Unperturbed by the raucous sounds, Mademoiselle Lesbiana prepared herself to confront, the enemy.  For a second she paused and looked up at the sky above her something had distracted her.  Beyond the clouds, Mademoiselle Lesbiana noticed a ring of fire that was created by the rising sun.  She took a moment to appreciate this view as the sun gently lit up the sky.  Looking down she noticed the reflection of the sun and the sky on the sea below.

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Liebster Award.

Image

 

I was very kindly presented with the Liebster Award by two lovely bloggers; Jemma and Enissa

I am sorry that I have not yet had the time to respond to both of the bloggers posts and questions.  I shall do so here, now in this space.  I hope a superhero alarm won’t sound and that I will manage to finish this post.  The rules are as follows:

The Liebster Award is awarded to bloggers to try to promote their blog a little and bring together a community of bloggers. The nominated user must provide a link back to the person who nominated them.Provide 11 facts about yourself
 and answer 11 questions set by the person who nominated you. Choose 11 more people and ask them 11 questions!

11 Facts about myself:

I love a laugh

I love to make others laugh

I am a peoples person when I am not being a superhero

I love food

I love cooking

I enjoy gardening

I am a little eccentric

I like to travel

I reluctantly go to the gym so I can maintain a superhero physique

I do not eat eggs or anchovies

I can be a chatterbox

 The lovely Jemma nominated me the award first.  Her blog is fun, she writes about her TEFL experiences.  Her questions are as follows:

  1. Do you love to travel?  Of course I love to travel, being a superhero requires that.  
  2. Why do you blog?  So that I can write about absolutely anything and hopefully make my readers giggle. 
  3. Do you sing in the shower?  Yes, almost always.
  4. Have you had to learn a new language for work? No I speak two languages.
  5. Have you ever done anything crazy for charity? Yes, I did a 2.6k Swimathon against Dr’s orders (due to a chronic back condition) to raise money for Cancer Research.  
  6. How do you feel about being nominated for the Liebster Award? I was extremely surprised because I only had 6 posts at the time.
  7. What do you do when you are not blogging?  Two jobs; Library Curator and Superhero. 
  8. Are you on Facebook?  Yes and you can link to me via my wordpress page
  9. Do you tweet? Yes and again you can link to me via my wordpress page. 
  10. Do you have an active lifestyle? Only when I have to go on my magnetic missions.
  11. What is your favourite recipe? (If you can, please can you post it too) I am a lover of foods.  I will give you a pretty easy smoothie recipe.  1 large ripe avocado ripe, 1 ripe sweet mango, peel both and slice, put into a blender, add honey (to taste), add a dash of rose water or orange blossom water (whichever you prefer), put a glass of milk, a few ice cubes and blend away.  This is enough smoothie for two people or a large glass for yourself.  I hope you try it out and enjoy it. 

 

The lovely Enissa.  Her blog is fascinating.  It is real and raw.  I enjoy it and I hope you give her blog a go and see for yourself.

The questions Enissa asked are as follows:

♥ What was the last book you read and why? Women at Point Zero, N. El Saadawi.   I love her work.  

♥ What inspires you more than anything? Being a superhero

♥Who is someone you know that you respect and admire? My Mama Why? (no one Famous) Because she has supported me through everything and always gives me unconditional love.

♥What is a gift or talent that you have? I have several; I am a superhero.

♥What qualities do you love about yourself?  I am a peoples person, I am patient, kind, empathetic and do not discriminate. 

♥What qualities do you wish you can change or strongly dislike? When I am not a superhero I often suffer from an ontological crisis. 

♥What pivotal moment made you start your blog? My wonderful partner has been encouraging me for a few years to start writing.  Why?  So I can make people giggle and allow them to see inside my creative mind. 

♥Where do you see yourself five years from now?  Hopefully continuing to fight for world peace. 

♥ What is your favorite t.v. show and why?  Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  I love Superheros

♥ What is your favorite ice cream flavor?  This is tough, I have a few.  Vanilla, Pistachio and Hazelnut. 

♥What type of music do you like?  I like listening to happy music and most genres. 

My nominees are as follows:  LMKan, Violet Skye, MicroGalactic, Romeo at twenty, Sean, Desi & Meghan, Meg, Miki, Athena

unfortunately I cannot nominate any more because the other blogs I follow have thousands of followers.

My questions to fellow bloggers:

1: If you could be any superhero who would you be?

2: What would your superhero anthem be?

3: If you could have any superpower what would it be?

4: Who would be your Superhero Enemy Number One?

5: If you could choose a superhero outfit what colours would you pick out?

6:  What is your favorite Superhero film?

7: What one food item do you think a superhero should include in their diet?

8: I am sure you are getting fed up of superhero questions, yes or no?

9:  What is your life motto?

10: what is the one quality you wish your best friend would possess?

11: How many skittles can you eat at once?

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The Final Show.

It was almost two years after my birth.   I hadn’t enjoyed my first year on earth because my vibrations were causing an international media stir.  I became the centre of attention.  There was not one newspaper on the planet that hadn’t covered my story.  Mama told me a few years later that I was written about in every single language spoken on the planet.  She still finds this fact amazing.  My photograph was printed and I was on talk shows which often made me vibrate.  A doctor was always on standby with a stethoscope to inform the audience what my inner voice was saying.  Quite often I was begging to “turn the lights down.” I struggled with all the studio lights glaring down on me.   The only blessing that year was the fact that Christina had agreed to appear alongside me in photographs and on some television shows.  It meant I got to see her again and I would vibrate with excitement.  She found me adorable when I would say “you look beautiful today, can I have a cuddle”.  It always worked she would pick me up and give me a big hug whilst tickling my belly and say “Marie you are indeed a marvel” and as she would put me back down she would kiss my cheeks and I would giggle.  I used to curl up on the floor once she put me down and roll around, I was so happy.  After the photo shoots and television interviews, Christina would leave and I would go for days without vibrating.  Interviews eventually became fewer and far between.  I would wait for days on end to see Christina.  One day the days became months and the months became a year. I did not see Christina at all.  One day mama agreed on a final interview.  It was a live broadcast and the whole of the maternity unit where I was born were going to be present.  Some of the experts from Scotland’s specialist Pediatric Unit were going to attend.  Dr Brown, who had been my consultant was going to be present along with the hospital director.  Dr Brown irritated me, he had a rather peculiar accent and I could barely understand him.  He used to find it amusing prodding and poking me, drawing blood and pressing his cold monaural stethoscope against my belly.  He was quite clumsy and heavy handed, he had no insight whatsoever.  Often he would press his ear firmly against the cone forgetting that I was a baby.  The pressure would hurt and I would often tell him “back off baldy”.  He would be offended but I didn’t care.  No one else could hear what I had said and I noticed he never repeated what I said when I called him baldy.

We got into the studio and a host came along who needed no introductions, Opera.  Opera was an international figure.  Mama and papa were delighted to meet her.  She was a short, full and smiley woman.  She smiled a lot, I called her Mrs Smiley.  I liked Opera.  She wasn’t attractive but she had a very kind face with a gentleness to her.   The cameras started rolling and I looked up and down, left and right and back to front until I spotted her, Christina.  I smiled at her. Although extremely excited I attempted not to vibrate as Dr Brown was sat beside me with his cone at hand.  I did not want to give him the satisfaction of repeating something that would have compromised my relationship with Christina.  Christina’s big blue eyes met mine as she gave me a beautiful smile.  I was so ecstatic that I giggled and started to vibrate. Dr Brown immediately unbuttoned my baby grow revealing my navel and placed that cold cone on my belly “I hate you baldy” and said frowning at him.  Shocked he moved away from the cone and gave me a very nasty look, I knew he didn’t like me but he liked the money he was making out of me.  Opera asked him whether or not I had said anything, I started vibrating again.  Turning red he shook his head.  I lent forwards and I slapped him on his face to attract his attention he placed the cone on my belly again “I want to sit on Christina’s lap and I will talk to her and only her, do you understand”?  Mr Brown looked at me and was clearly upset, he repeated on live television what I had said.  I did not care if the world knew how I felt about Christina, I could see she was a beautiful woman and I knew that the rest of the world would have agreed.  Christina came trotting along.  She lifted me and I wrapped my arms around her.  I wanted to feel her body and smell her perfume.  She always smelled like freshly cut flowers.  Her scent would lightly linger in the room.  I started to vibrate “thank you Opera for bringing us here.  Mama and Papa love your show.” Opera smiled, “oh, wow, it’s a pleasure, you are quite the marvel”.  I vibrated some more and Christina repeated all that I said about how happy I was with life and how much I love my parents.  Finally I asked Opera, “Do all children have the same thing as me? Do all kids come on your show”? Opera looked at me, her face became quite serious, “No Marie, you are the only one in the world that we know of who is capable of this, this is why everyone wants to meet you”.  I was sad, I didn’t want to be different.  I looked at Christina and started crying, she held me tightly and rocked me, she kissed my cheeks and sung me a lullaby as Opera distracted the audience by talking to the medics.  After a few moments I pulled myself together and started to vibrate, and Christina placed her cone on my belly, “Can you please ask them to stop writing about me and filming me, I do not want to be different, I want to be like everyone else”.  Christina repeated this to Opera.  Opera looked at Christina and took me in her arms, “Of course Marie, I will make sure no one talks to you again,” and she hugged me and kissed me gently on my cheeks.  I smiled at her and then turned to look at Christina.  I stretched out my arms and she took me from Opera.  I placed my head between her pert breasts and I relaxed in her arms.  Christina whispered in my ear “Marie, I will make sure that this really is the final show, my baby”.  With that I relaxed and fell asleep in Christina’s arms.

I was dreaming and in my dream I was with Christina.  She was looking after me, feeding me, rocking me and throwing me up and catching me.  I was so happy.  I was looking into her big blue eyes the whole time.  In the background Barry White was singing and Christina was humming along to the music.  At that moment I woke up to the sounds of the live audience clapping and cheering.  Christina looked at me and said “I don’t know if I will see you again my darling”. Overcome with emotion and not knowing what to say to Christina I sung, “You’re the first, the last, my everything“. It was Barry White’s number one hit in 1974.

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The Dream!

Present day.

5am the following morning…

In deep sleep Marie was dreaming of Lopez’s luscious lips that she had planted a teasing kiss on the previous day.  Quietly moaning she slowly rolled onto her belly.   She could smell Captain Lopez’s alluring scent as she moved closely towards her while gently brushing her long brown wavy hair away from her neck. She tilted Lopez’s head to one side placed her soft lips on to her neck and nibbled her ever so gently before giving her a sensual kiss.  She moved her lips slowly towards her shoulders. She could feel Lopez’s warm skin and hear her breathing deeply as she teasingly continued to caress her body.  She paused as she looked up at Lopez and raised an eyebrow, smiled cheekily, then proceeded to kiss her body with a little more urgency.  Pulling Lopez firmly towards her she embraced her, kissing her passionately and flicking her tongue against her and gently biting down on her bottom lip while looking Lopez directly into her big brown eyes.  Lopez moaned and moved closer to Marie aware that she was tantalizing her.  She slowly lifted Marie’s fitted t-shirt and dug her nails into her back.  Marie grasped Lopez’s hands, firmly taking control.   She pressed her body harder against hers while sliding a leg between Lopez’s thighs.  Lopez gasped and Marie took the opportunity to kiss her slipping her tongue inside to discover her wanting mouth.  The two women lost in a lustful moment when suddenly an alarm startled Marie.  Looking around her attempting to identify the source of the sirens that disturbed this intensity, Marie realised it was a warning.  Lopez, oblivious to the alarm, looked quizzically at Marie, wondering why she had pulled away so suddenly.  In that second this magical moment ended and Marie awoke abruptly finding herself with her hands pressing firmly against her ears, “Bloody hell, why now?” she screamed in her silent dark bedroom.

The screeches of the sirens continued in her head as she jumped out of bed, racing to get into her superhero uniform.  Clumsily tripping on the way to her walk-in closet, Marie was still hot and flustered.  She was incredibly frustrated that she had been disturbed by the Mayday call to save The United Queerdom.  She hated the fact that Marisa Scarey, the island’s Enemy Number One, was still able to get inside her head!  Attempting to shake off her dream in order to clear her mind, Marie transformed into Mademoiselle Lesbiana.   Rushing through her contemporary and minimalist living room, Mademoiselle Lesbiana jumped into her fireplace and flew through the shaft and out through her chimney and into the sky as she sped across the island.  Flicking the switch on her leather bracelet her super bazookas gave her a much needed turbo boost as she was on her way to face Marisa Scarey.

 

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Background

I was born in the winter of 1972.  It was cold, dark and grey as papa rushed mama to the hospital.  Her waters broke while she was taking communion at the local church which was awfully embarrassing for her. The priest, not wanting to draw attention to mama, lifted his cassock and dropped it over her head while rushing her out of the church to papa’s car.  On the way to the hospital mama felt me kicking and she swore that through her womb she felt vibrations that she had never experienced during the nine months I had been inside her.

Papa rushed mama to the maternity ward. There was a slim, tall, tanned and very attractive blonde midwife named Christina. Mama told Christina about the strange vibration.  Placing her monaural stethoscope on mama’s body Christina swore she heard me saying “get me out now!” At least that’s what mama and papa told me a few years later.  Christina was amazed and brought the whole of the ward to the room so that they could each hear in turn what I was saying.  After repeating myself for almost an hour I finally said, “Seriously get me out of here before I crawl out!”  After eighteen hours of pushing and panting mama finally delivered a beautiful baby, me, Marie.  The first thing I saw in this world apart from mama’s bottom  were Christina’s beautiful honey eyes and perfect smile.  I was besotted. I remember snuggling into her neck and wrapping my wrinkly arms around her.  She thought I was adorable.   I knew I wanted to leave a lasting impression on her.

Mama and papa both held me and kissed me until they finally got over the excitement of my birth.  Meeting my parents for the first time exhausted me and I eventually fell asleep.  Mama was meant to leave the hospital the following day but news had travelled around the hospital that I had demanded to be delivered.  I was quite the marvel. Rather than mama and papa leave the hospital, the director gave my parents a private room with a double bed and a bedside cot.  There was a bedside table upon which was a radio that mama and papa kept on throughout the day.  The room was on the top floor and it had French windows that overlooked the local village.  The village was very green and boasted a tall clock in the town square which was visible on a clear sunny day.  I was excited to leave so that I could explore the village and the place that I would call home.  I was wondering if I had any cousins or aunties or uncles.  I noticed that there was a distinct lack of friends and family.

Mama and papa were offered three meals a day and had all their demands met in exchange that all staff and members of the community could come visit me. At first I had no idea what was going on.  Eventually I was overwhelmed and frustrated and as a reaction I would start vibrating.  My vibrations attracted a lot of attention and one day the hospital director took out a stethoscope and placed it on my belly. He was shocked by what he heard, “Please get me out of here, I cannot handle all of this chaos and need some time to process being born and entering this weird world”.   The director called in some expert help from a specialist Paediatric Unit in Scotland who all rushed down by helicopter the following day.

The next morning I woke up to find myself in a room full of people in white uniforms.  Each had a stethoscope and in turn they placed it on my belly.  Desperate to leave I started to vibrate once again.  By this stage I noticed that mama and papa were extremely tired.  Although the hospital had been very kind and accommodating, none of us wanted to be there.  We had been in there for almost a week I had only seen Christina twice.  I was missing her.  I stopped vibrating for a while because I noticed that when I did it would draw attention and that cold cone would be placed on my belly.  In order to emotionally switch off I would listen to the radio.  A song kept playing and I attempted to learn the words hoping that Christina would return so that I could sing to her.  One day lost in my thoughts I started vibrating.  A short plump brunette walked over to me and placed a cone on my belly and the other end to her ear.  The sound that travelled up the cone startled her.   “Won’t you play with my ding-a-ling?”  Chuck Berry’s number one hit of 1972.

 

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